Best Self Help Books for Forgiving Yourself (2026)

If you keep replaying a past mistake or a hurt someone caused, the best self help books for forgiving yourself can give you a place to start. This list is for a reader who needs to forgive themselves or someone else, and we compared five titles by who each suits and what each listing states.

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The picks

#	Product	Shelf Score	Buy
1	Forgive Ourselves Totally by Kendall	9.7/10	Buy
2	Forgiving What You Can't by TerKeurst	9.7/10	Buy
3	The Art of Forgiving by Smedes	9.6/10	Buy
4	When God Doesn't Fix It by Story	9.5/10	Buy
5	Affirmations for Forgiving by Dayton	9.5/10	Buy

1

Forgive Ourselves Totally by Kendall

R.T. Kendall·9.7/10 Shelf Score

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The Shelf Score runs from 9.2 to 9.8 and weighs fit for the reader or goal (35 points), contents and edition (25), value (25) and listed reading age or level (10, where the listing gives one), using only what the book listing states. How we pick ›

For a reader ready to forgive themselves, as a follow-up to Total Forgiveness.

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Pros

• Ties self-forgiveness to forgiving others
• 224 pages, published July 24, 2007
• Direct focus on forgiving yourself

Cons

• Edition field reads 52618th, so confirm the ISBN
• New readers of the author may want the first book
• No reading age or grade level stated

2

Forgiving What You Can't by TerKeurst

Lysa TerKeurst·9.7/10 Shelf Score

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The Shelf Score runs from 9.2 to 9.8 and weighs fit for the reader or goal (35 points), contents and edition (25), value (25) and listed reading age or level (10, where the listing gives one), using only what the book listing states. How we pick ›

For a reader stuck on hurt from someone who will not apologize or change.

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Pros

• Step-by-step process for moving on
• Pairs practical steps with Bible-based teaching
• 288 pages, published November 17, 2020

Cons

• Focuses more on others than on self-forgiveness
• Faith-based teaching, which some readers may not want
• Description mentions painful memories and deep hurt

3

The Art of Forgiving by Smedes

Lewis B. Smedes·9.6/10 Shelf Score

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The Shelf Score runs from 9.2 to 9.8 and weighs fit for the reader or goal (35 points), contents and edition (25), value (25) and listed reading age or level (10, where the listing gives one), using only what the book listing states. How we pick ›

For a reader who wants a practical guide to forgiving people who hurt them.

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Pros

• Explains why, what, whom and how to forgive
• Describes three stages of forgiveness
• 192 pages, one of the shorter picks

Cons

• Little on forgiving yourself
• Description mentions betrayal and hate
• Published August 12, 1997, no reading age stated

4

When God Doesn't Fix It by Story

Laura Story·9.5/10 Shelf Score

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The Shelf Score runs from 9.2 to 9.8 and weighs fit for the reader or goal (35 points), contents and edition (25), value (25) and listed reading age or level (10, where the listing gives one), using only what the book listing states. How we pick ›

For a reader working through unanswered prayer or disappointment more than forgiveness.

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Pros

• Speaks honestly about disappointment and unanswered prayer
• Lists topics such as peace in uncertainty
• 304 pages, published September 15, 2015

Cons

• Forgiveness is not the main focus
• Description mentions a spouse's brain tumor and grief
• Faith-based throughout, which may not suit every reader

5

Affirmations for Forgiving by Dayton

Dr. Tian Dayton PhD TEP·9.5/10 Shelf Score

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The Shelf Score runs from 9.2 to 9.8 and weighs fit for the reader or goal (35 points), contents and edition (25), value (25) and listed reading age or level (10, where the listing gives one), using only what the book listing states. How we pick ›

For a reader who wants a daily format for letting go of resentment.

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Pros

• Daily affirmation format, per the title
• Focuses on resentment and letting go
• 275 pages, per the listing

Cons

• Published June 1, 1992, so wording may feel dated
• Suits short daily reading more than a long read
• No reading age or grade level stated

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More picks to compare

• Moving Forward by WorthingtonFor readers who want self-forgiveness with a faith-based path and six listed steps.Check on Amazon
• Forgiving Yourself by FlaniganFor readers who want a step-by-step program for self-forgiveness after their own mistakes.Check on Amazon
• Letting Go by BulmezFor readers replaying a betrayal who want exercises and journaling prompts.Check on Amazon

Compare the picks

Book details as published on each listing, collected 17 October 2026.

How we scored them

The Shelf Score weighs fit for the reader, contents and edition, value, and the listed reading age or level where one is given. None of the five listings states a reading age or grade level, so the scores rest on fit, contents and value. How we pick explains the weights.

Scores run from 9.2 to 9.8: each book’s point total is placed on that range, so more points always means a higher score. Reading age or level counts on a list where at least one listing gives one, and a book whose listing gives none then scores zero on it. Where no listing gives one, the score is taken over the other 85 points. Books carry no warranty, so warranty is not scored.

How to choose the best self help books for forgiving yourself

Decide who the hurt is about

If someone else caused the hurt, The Art of Forgiving and the TerKeurst book cover forgiving people who wronged you. If the regret is about your own choices, How To Forgive Ourselves Totally puts self-forgiveness first. For a partner, see our best self help books for couples list, and for a breakup, see our best self help books for after a breakup list.

Check the faith framing

When God Doesn’t Fix It and the TerKeurst book draw on Christian teaching, so read the description if you want a secular approach. Affirmations for Forgiving and How To Forgive Ourselves Totally do not mention faith in their descriptions.

Match the format to your reading time

Affirmations for Forgiving is built around daily affirmations, while the other four picks are full books to read through. Page counts run from 192 to 304, so a shorter read may suit a reader with little time.

Before you buy

• Check the publication date and edition, since two picks date from 1992 and 1997.
• Look for a stated reading age or grade level, because none of these listings gives one.
• Read the description for themes such as betrayal, grief or illness before buying for a sensitive reader.

Frequently Asked Questions

Which of these books focus on forgiving yourself?

How To Forgive Ourselves Totally is the pick whose description centers on self-forgiveness. It is listed as a follow-up to Total Forgiveness.

Does any listing state a reading age?

No. None of the five listings states a reading age or grade level, so preview the first pages to judge the level.

Which edition should I buy?

Compare the publication date and ISBN on the listing, since the Daily Affirmations book dates from 1992.

Still deciding? Our top pickForgive Ourselves Totally by Kendall

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